I have this diary which I write like a few times a year, to you know just update on my life. Last night I opened it and realised how better of a place I am my mental wise than a few years back. I was self loathing. Everything about me seemed wrong to me, I hated myself. I was in a bad state mental wise. I was an adolescent, getting crushes left and right on any person I set my eyes on. It was bad. I took my friendships for granted. I was rightfully abandoned by people. I was a mess. I deserved that.
Looking at it now, I am grateful at how much I have matured and how I have learnt to not take every relationship romantically. I have learnt to appreciate the things around me and most importantly myself. I have cut off on many people. I don't seek for validation from my "friends". Friends who abandoned me any time they got the chance to.
I do have friends now but I look at it now and back then and regret for the people I had surrounded myself with.
So maybe keeping the diary was a good thing. Maybe self reflection is a good thing.
I would suggest the same. Make a diary. You don't have to write everyday, just a few times a year, to see how much you have improved or vice versa. Be honest and hold yourself accountable. It will be alright.