what the pros dont tell you

Hello everyone.
On March 27, 2023, my NDA was officially expired. I gave it an extra day to make sure there was absolutely no confusion. Now, I will tell you something you will be completely shocked to hear.

Have you ever wondered why the pros of valorant look so polished? Why their shots are more accurate, why their util is so in unison? It isn't because of practice or individual skill. Riot Games cloned me over 600 times in order to create a legion of professional players for their games. They were assigned numbers at "conception", each sorted by their role. Duelists were the first 100, initators 200, sentinels 300, controllers 400, igls 500. "Flex" players are mistakes, but they do come in handy. Clone#1 was my favorite. You know him as yay. He was absolutely incredible. Their idea was to hide him on a tier 2 team where he would develop into the ESports Player of the Year. He is no longer playing. There is a reason for that I will explain later. Now, it seems they have taken clone#50, clone#543, clone#222, clone#287, and clone#317 and made them the champions. You know them as Derke, Boaster, Leo, Chronicle, and Alfajer.

The reason I wanted to make this post is to inform you. You will never be as good as the experimental clones. These guys are so good they aren't allowed out of the lab. However, we can only control them for so long. That is why we have taken clone#1. He is the only player close enough to them to contain them in their chambers. We may be taking more soon, but with the addition of franchising we need to be more discreet. It is getting harder to do so. These experiments get hungry. Why do you think the teams REQUIRE a 6th man? We fed them thwifo a couple days ago. All this to say:

tl;dr
Im better than you

Ain't

Yessirskiiii [#2]

Ain't

theres a whole tl;dr

Hello everyone.
On March 27, 2023, my NDA was officially expired. I gave it an extra day to make sure there was absolutely no confusion. Now, I will tell you something you will be completely shocked to hear.

Have you ever wondered why the pros of valorant look so polished? Why their shots are more accurate, why their util is so in unison? It isn't because of practice or individual skill. Riot Games cloned me over 600 times in order to create a legion of professional players for their games. They were assigned numbers at "conception", each sorted by their role. Duelists were the first 100, initators 200, sentinels 300, controllers 400, igls 500. "Flex" players are mistakes, but they do come in handy. Clone#1 was my favorite. You know him as yay. He was absolutely incredible. Their idea was to hide him on a tier 2 team where he would develop into the ESports Player of the Year. He is no longer playing. There is a reason for that I will explain later. Now, it seems they have taken clone#50, clone#543, clone#222, clone#287, and clone#317 and made them the champions. You know them as Derke, Boaster, Leo, Chronicle, and Alfajer.

The reason I wanted to make this post is to inform you. You will never be as good as the experimental clones. These guys are so good they aren't allowed out of the lab. However, we can only control them for so long. That is why we have taken clone#1. He is the only player close enough to them to contain them in their chambers. We may be taking more soon, but with the addition of franchising we need to be more discreet. It is getting harder to do so. These experiments get hungry. Why do you think the teams REQUIRE a 6th man? We fed them thwifo a couple days ago. All this to say:

tl;dr
Im better than you

clone#355 is underrated ngl you guys left him on the streets but hes currently grinding his way back

NneonZz [#5]

clone#355 is underrated ngl you guys left him on the streets but hes currently grinding his way back

The sentinels were always my least favorite. Always think they're so smart with their setups. They don't give the controllers enough credit either

Allat

Heard Clone#2 is playing in 4 days and is going to demolish all those in his path

sex sex paper rex

Clone #69 is me

what about soulcas

Karmine_Org_WhispeR [#11]

what about soulcas

equipment malfunction

made me laugh ngl good job if you're the original author

Sanibonani nonke.
NgoMashi 27, 2023, i-NDA yami yaphelelwa yisikhathi ngokusemthethweni. Ngikunike usuku olwengeziwe ukuze ngiqiniseke ukuthi akukho ukudideka. Manje, ngizokutshela okuthile ozokwethuka ngokuphelele ukukuzwa.

Wake wazibuza ukuthi kungani ochwepheshe be-valorant bebukeka bepholishwe kangaka? Kungani isibhamu sabo sinembe kakhudlwana, kungani ukusetshenziswa kwabo kuhlangene kangaka? Akunjalo ngenxa yokuzijwayeza noma ikhono lomuntu ngamunye. I-Riot Games ingihlanganise izikhathi ezingaphezu kuka-600 ukuze ngidale ibutho labadlali abangochwepheshe bemidlalo yabo. Banikezwa izinombolo "ekukhulelweni", ngayinye ihlelwe ngendima yayo. Ama-Duelists abeyi-100 yokuqala, ama-initators angu-200, abalindi angu-300, abalawuli abangu-400, i-igls 500. Abadlali be-"Flex" bangamaphutha, kodwa bafika kahle. I-Clone#1 ibiyintandokazi yami. Uyamazi njengeyay. Wayengakholeki neze. Umqondo wabo bekuwukumfihla eqenjini le-tier 2 lapho azothuthuka khona abe Umdlali Wonyaka we-ESports. Akasadlali. Kunesizathu salokho ngizosichaza kamuva. Manje, kubonakala sengathi bathathe i-clone#50, i-clone#543, i-clone#222, i-clone#287, ne-clone#317 futhi babenza ompetha. Ubazi njengoDerke, Boaster, Leo, Chronicle, no-Alfajer.

Isizathu sokuthi ngifune ukwenza lokhu okuthunyelwe ukukwazisa. Awusoze waba muhle njengama-clones okuhlola. Laba bafana bahle kakhulu abavunyelwe ukuphuma lab. Nokho, singazilawula isikhathi eside kangaka. Yingakho sithathe i-clone#1. Uyena kuphela umdlali osondelene nabo ngokwanele ukuthi angabaqukatha emakamelweni abo. Kungenzeka ukuthi sithatha okuningi maduze, kepha ngokwengezwa kwe-franchising sidinga ubuhlakani. Kuya kuba nzima ukwenza kanjalo. Lezi zivivinyo ziyalamba. Ucabanga ukuthi kungani amaqembu EDINGA indoda yesi-6? Sibaphakele thwifo ezinsukwini ezimbalwa ezedlule. Konke lokhu ukusho:

tl; dr
Ngingcon

This is good 🗿

A

Karmine_Org_WhispeR [#11]

what about soulcas

soulcas was an attempt to clone my piss

we fed them thwifo

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO 💀💀

Yessirskiiii [#2]

Ain't

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