the fact of the matter is that when you provoke someone knowing that they don't understand the nuance of what you're doing or saying, think of what it is to them. provoking. very simple.
should they stop and think about maybe it means something else? yes, 100%
should people be surprised when their provocation that the other person has no context or understanding of is met with poorly? no, 100%
in the end both groups are only willing to look at it from their perspective and not the others